Pinterest review: coconut milk baked chicken

Chicken plus coconut milk equals yum, so I pinned this recipe. For the most part, I followed it as directed. But I do have a (semi)pro tip: Skip the can opener. It’s for chumps.

(Also, your husband took it to work to open his canned tuna lunch, and you don’t have a spare. Vow to get one next time you’re at Target.)

The recipe clearly advocates for early marination, so you can’t wait for the can opener to come home with the hubs. Instead, grab a medium sized phillips head screwdriver and a hammer; use them to make two holes in the can of coconut milk. Attempt to pour it into your spice mix and realize it doesn’t want to be poured.

Curse in frustration as you retrieve a large-ish flat head screwdriver. Hammer it along the sides of your can top to slowly (so. slowly.) open it. When the suspense becomes unbearable, jimmy the can open as much as possible with a table knife, being careful not to slice open your hand. Feel smug and superior when your improvised system mostly works. You are an urban cooking legend.

Substitute fresh ginger and garlic for the powdered amounts, and replace the dried basil with a teaspoon-ish of chili powder. Whisk your mixture like a champ, then move on to butchering your chicken.

(You’ve watched Mark Bittman’s instructional video, so you vaguely know what this butchering business is about. Oddly, you realize that butchering a raw chicken is easier than carving a roasted one.)

Pull your chicken out of the fridge, only to realize it’s still partially frozen. Sigh. Then laugh. Then put your chicken back in the fridge, along with your currently useless marinade.

Try again with the chicken on day 2. Roast as directed, then run it under the broiler for five minutes or so (for extra crisping). Save all of your coconut-infused pan leavings, and pour them over your side of rice. Congratulate yourself on being a perfect partner, then stuff your face.

Repeat as needed.

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